Scholarship

So the Fatboy here went to a good ole' fashioned Strip Club this weekend. Now before too much judgement is passed, we were there for a bachelor party, and since I was filling in for the best man (he was sick), it was my civic duty to put the groom on scholarship. Some observations:

• All Strip Club bouncers are fucking douchebags.
  
• Black strippers really like me. Weird, right?
• Sometimes black strippers smell like soap.
• Russia must be absolutely loaded with hot chicks.
• Strippers are good at flattery.
  

This last point I'd like to touch more upon. Not just 1, but 2 of us left this place thinking we were in with one of these fine ladies. Now, by "in" i mean we thought they were into us. I don't know much, but I know this: Strippers are paid to make you feel like you are liked. Yet, oddly, every single time I've ever left a strip club, I wonder if one of the various girls I spoke with that evening had even an inkling of desire for the Fatboy. But then I realize that they're either trying to bleed money out of me right then and there, or at some point in the near future. I digress.

For all you future or current strippers out there, to touch up on your technique or maybe just make the team, there's this (there's different varieties? who knew!).

"Kissing a stripper is like licking a subway pole." - The Professor